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Hello, and Welcome to the Internet!
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Episode 54: The End of the Internet (And I Feel Hawtt) Updated: 2009-12-26 07:25:07 Description: With the end of the 00's, the boys reflect on the decade that has past in terms of great achievements in Music, Film and Television by sharing with you, our loyal listeners our definitive "Best of the Decade" lists. While this may sound boring as all...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 31: Is There Anybody Out There? Updated: 2008-10-27 22:23:54 Description: This is basically a test episode to see who the fuck is still out there. Also the very first Jono + Metcalf duet show, which, as one can imagine, leads to alot of rants and no-hold-barred silliness. Good news: We discovered the pop rocks problem, loo...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 53: The Good, The Bad And The HAWTTI Updated: 2009-11-24 05:58:20 Description: For this long awaited episode the boys had promised you a few famous guests. Did they deliver? Yes. Anthony, Branko and Jonathan graced the studio, hot from their tour of greater Howick after their article fame. However, the Artisan GUns, busy with a...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 52: In His Dylligent Presence Updated: 2009-10-19 09:42:14 Description: Long time HAWTTI friend Dylan Marshall was always going to appear on the show but this particular appearence came earlier than expected for one simple reason. Dylan (Mr. Dylligence) is a rapper. On this very special debut show he lays down a few uniq...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 51: Our Proposal Updated: 2009-09-30 05:02:06 Description: In this episode, their second ever live show, the boys are joined by longtime friend Stacey Brummer. She's up from Wellington so they have many questions about film productions she's working on and what the men are like there (strange, apparently). T...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 50: We'll Do It Live! Updated: 2009-09-18 14:36:44 Description: It may have taken over two years but the boys have finally made it to fifty episodes! What have they done to celebrate this especially monmentous event? Well...nothing really. But we had a deal, and you guys broke it (we didn't get cakes). This was a...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 48: Jessticulated Updated: 2009-07-13 05:51:11 Description: It's a non-stop gab fest this week as the boys are joined by a...uh... girl for the first time in two(ish) years. This does not mean that they were on their best behaviour though, far from it. Jessica Prebble is very game and discusses everything fro...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 49: Main Mann Updated: 2009-08-05 11:15:03 Description: What an asshole. How dare he not like Michael Mann. I for one love Michael mann. The plots, the digital video, he's unstoppable. Romance was kinda shitty but that's to be expected from such a great man. Hey fuck you if you hate Michael Mann, I love h...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 47: Boys, Branks, n' Harmony Updated: 2009-06-29 09:09:56 Description: The boys sound very good in this one. It's the holidays and they've almost made it to 50 shows. Jesus, they must have a deal with someone high up to get this far. Topics touched upon include yet another Loveable Loser episode, the very successful HAW...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 46: How Audible Is It? Updated: 2009-06-03 10:37:44 Description: We can promise that this is the most raw and honest episode yet. Much of this is due to the guest, Sean Winchester, who promised to tell the whole truth about everything. If you're offended by anything said, go fuck yourself. Topics touched upon incl...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 45: (I've Got Those) Bus Girl Blues Updated: 2009-05-19 08:42:08 Description: Today we bring you not only one but TWO very special guests into the studio for somewhat of a reunion episode. Touted as one of the longest episodes in HAWTTI history (by us) this may almost be worth the time we made you wait for it. Among the topics...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 44: Shore Things Updated: 0000-00-00 00:00:00 Description: Joined in the studio by a very special guest we've been trying to source for weeks, the boys churn out a fantastic show with full bore discussion from beginning to end. From recent concert reports (the Who, Coldplay) to discussions on the rights and ...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 43: Coffee & Sugar Updated: 2009-03-13 03:48:52 Description: In an alternate 2009 New Zealand, HAWTTIers are part of the fabric of everyday society, and the "Doomsday Clock" - which charts Morgans' tension with Branko - is permanently set at five minutes to midnight. When one of his former colleagues is murder...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 42: IT'S FUCKING DISTRAAAACTING (OH GOOD) Updated: 2009-02-17 10:36:58 Description: After a very characteristic break, the boys are back in the studio with a bottle full of booze and a barrel full of tales to tell. We've been very busy over the last few weeks, and since Metcalf has a girlfriend, he doesn't care about anyone else bec...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 41: Oh, Lonesome Morgan Updated: 2009-01-21 07:42:52 Description: After a lengthy holiday break (which was sweet) the boys bring you our first ever DOUBLE EPISODE to make up for the lack of shows recently. This episode contains both our holiday reports, tales of woe, dirty cheating bitches AND our Big Day Out Repor...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 39: Podcastin' Is Dead Updated: 2008-12-16 03:47:57 Description: With a ream of concert tales and party debauchery to divulge, this episode is well and truly stuffed with content. We recap further events from the Christchurch trip, the new Bond film, Shitcalf's band playing on Bfm, and how he is the biggest asshol...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 40: MERRRRRYYYYY CHRISTMASSSSSSSSS! Updated: 2008-12-24 02:29:35 Description: With the weighty task of living up to last years HAWTTI Christmas Extravaganza, the boys were anxious. But on the night (day) of recording, brimming full of enthusiasm we went straight into it, with neither a list or an idea in sight. With an very sp...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 38: Elliot Smith Lives! Updated: 2008-11-29 05:55:15 Description: This episode is a double HAWTTI first - not only is it our very first (and probably last) episode in the sunny city of Christchurch, we also have our first actual celebrity guest on our show. That's right, THE Elliot Smith, prolific singer/songwriter...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 37: Quite A Bad Episode, Really Updated: 2008-11-16 22:40:46 Description: With this episode, the boys step down from the mantle and cement their place in podcast history's Razzie Awards. Years from now this episode will be hailed for destroying what little audience HAWTTI have left. Discussion ranges from Halloween parties...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 36: Quite A Good Episode, Really Updated: 2008-10-27 22:29:01 Description: With this episode, the boys step up to the mantle and cement their place in podcast history. Years from now this episode will be hailed for rejuvenating the tired podcast format. Discussion ranges from halloween, to the zoo, to current events involvi...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 35: Dr. Zeus Updated: 2008-10-12 22:55:30 Description: You heard the last abortion of an episode (sorry!) but this one's alright, the boys are on the level and they have some interesting things to talk about. Producer Pearce wasn't there (he was too busy indulging himself in an Artisan Guns circle jerk) ...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 28: The Last Waltz Updated: 2008-07-30 06:43:02 Description: It is a sad day in HAWTTI history when we have to tell you all there won't be any new shows, for a while. Six weeks to be exact. However, the best we could do in this situation is give a rollicking final episode before the break. We believe we have a...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 29: No-Calf Cast Updated: 2008-07-09 06:16:39 Description: Metcalf's in Europe but does that mean nothing interesting has happened to the boys since? Hardly, lives have continued and sinces Calf's exit, they've had to deal with friends smashing vases, exams,and disgusting sports losses, among many other thin...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 32: Joseph Main Updated: 2008-08-24 09:55:34 Description: Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Main Joseph Mai...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 33: If you're Gonna Shake, Fuckin' Do It RIght Updated: 2008-09-08 12:24:54 Description: With no guests appearing this time, we discuss a range of topics including how to write a hit pop song, MILF Sarah Palin, Tropic Thunder, Handshake Ethics and the not-so-recent death of the Hi-5. Pearce is talking alot more nowadays. Good on ya, Pea...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 34: DOWN WITH CENSORSHIP Updated: 2008-09-30 00:48:57 Description: The show starts, dark as ever, and lo-and-behold Jonathan Morgan is drunk. And mad. Perhaps recording a show is a bad idea? When did that ever stop us at HAWTTI? Never I hear you say. So, we give you the full MORGAN DRUNK RANT episode, unedited, unmo...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 26: Fight Club Updated: 2008-05-19 15:05:12 Description: This week sees a return of OUR FRIENDS - sorry about the wait, but we've truly been spending every waking minute compliling our thoughts on this one iandividual. Further topics are covered including favourite Bond themes, some fucking retarded ads, a...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 27: Tough Love Updated: 2008-05-26 07:13:30 Description: On the most tension-filled episode of HAWTTI yet, the shit hits the fan, with explosive results. Bridges are burned (and rebuilt) in an unprecedented episode of head-to-head arguing. We even manage to fit in the weekend's events, Indiana Jones, the n...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 25: Our Friends Updated: 2008-05-04 11:57:33 Description: Setting the scene was Sly Stallone as "Cobra" in that classic action flick of the same name. Needless to say, it was a good night already. As always, we recount goings on of the weekend including a roaring 80th-Birthday bash in true Serbian style, Pe...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 24: A Midsummer Nights Cream Updated: 2008-04-27 11:51:47 Description: The boys bring you another fun-filled chapter of the Great HAWTTI Songbook. They discuss an awesome saturday night involving a gig, $16 cocktails and being hit on (horribly). Old men who fart (not Metcalf), pornographic shakespeare (possibly Metcalf)...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 23: If You Don't Know How To Download This Podcast, Ask Updated: 2008-04-19 00:00:00 Description: Alex Freer, drummer of The Artisan Guns joins the boys for a rip-roaring show of immense proportion. Crammed full of discussion about the weekends OC-esque happenings, awesome bars in the city and Morgan's questionable work ethics and much, much mor...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 22: Ice To See You! Updated: 2008-03-29 13:27:51 Description: After seeing the new Rambo movie, the boys decided it was high time for a new installment of HAWTTI and lo and behold, Morgan was awake this time. Morgasm - what the fuck is that by the way? - joins Branko and Calf for some great discussion ranging f...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 20: 2Girls1Shitcalf Updated: 2008-03-03 09:28:31 Description: Have we got a show for you. Branko rants and raves about some crackwhore who (allegedly) stole his semen and created an army of bizzaro Branko's in order to get out a parking ticket. Morgan recounts his standup show on the 25, blow by blow (by blow)....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 21: There Will Be Bud Updated: 2008-03-16 11:15:52 Description: In the episode, Metcalf is no longer flying solo and is rejoined with pals Branko and Pearce for an emotional, heartfelt return to podcasting glory. We discuss stuff that has been occupying everybodys time so heavily recently, and some awesome concer...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 19: Liverpool Sucks Updated: 2008-02-18 11:08:43 Description: Everyone's favourite Scouser, Chinney Osunwa, stops by the Metcalf house this week for a revealing and controversial chat with the boys. They discuss the two best movies of the year (sans spoilers this time), Chinney's scary dad and how cool Dunedin...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 18: The Matthew Hope Variety Hour Updated: 2008-02-05 00:39:09 Description: As the boys sit down in Metcalf's basement to record a new (and very late) episode of HAWTTI something very unexpected happens, which makes the rest of the show sound like recess at a school for special needs children. However, we still managed to di...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 17: Private Property Updated: 2008-01-16 01:06:15 Description: In their first show since the dawning of 2008, the boys reflect on their tomfoolery over their New Year holiday. They discuss the latest release from Wes Anderson, "unfuckwithable" albums and people who steal food intended for everyone, ruining the h...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 15: Unforgivable Updated: 2007-12-22 07:05:35 Description: In an episode of bridges burning, Morgan yearning and Pearce being discerning (as always) the boys bring you some great stories, really quiet sound effects (which may be a relief). Morgan brings you another Loveable Loser™ story, and Pearce mak...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 16: Christmas Special Updated: 2007-12-24 23:42:03 Description: In an episode of bridges burning, Morgan yearning and Pearce being discerning (as always) the boys bring you some great stories, really quiet sound effects (which may be a relief). Morgan brings you another Loveable Loser™ story, and Pearce mak...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 14: Newcomer Of The Year Updated: 2007-12-16 11:42:30 Description: Anthony still has his soundboard. It's 10 minutes since the last show. Morgan insists he knows more about Branko's family than he does. Marriage, conflict, forgetful sub-celebrities and sultry guitar players are all themes deeply woven in the thread ...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 13: K&P Updated: 2007-12-08 23:18:42 Description: In this episode, the boys (without Pearce) talk about what they've been up to since the last episode (a lot, it seems) and remember their final year at Macleans. They profess their love for a faraway beauty and wonder why Mr. Peek insisted on using t...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 12: Everyone Else Is Rubbish Except Us Updated: 2007-11-23 04:53:39 Description: In this episode the boys are joined by Matt Hope to discuss a contentious issue. No, not Metcalf's nipples, although that does come up later in the show. This episode....wow. Just listen. Be amazed....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Toliet, A Short Story Updated: 2007-11-20 05:48:54 Description: Here lies 50 seconds of the most ridiculous, retarded crap that you'll ever hear. Hopefully this should tide you all over till the next show. COMING SOON TO A COMPUTER NEAR "YOU"....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 11: The Prostitute Updated: 2007-11-05 01:39:50 Description: In this highly anticipated episode of HAWTTI, the boys talk about their semi-feud with a well known Devonport band, respond to a mysterious fan's video and tell the stories they wouldn't tell you before. Don't fuck with the Boden's....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 10: Sexual Tension Updated: 2007-10-27 08:05:08 Description: Hark! Branko returns! The one and only Oliver Carle joins the boys in the studio for a second time, with even greater results. We touch on Math Rock, fucked up movies, WWE, and Branko uses a phrase flawlessly. We even spoil The Prestige for you liste...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Pilot Episode Updated: 2007-07-12 11:22:21 Description: In their first ever episode, the guys discuss work stories, their greatest sandwiches and violently abuse their producer, among much else....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 6: Paying Our Debt Updated: 2007-09-14 23:26:19 Description: The boys are back in town! In their first show since August 9th (a whole month!) they talk about all that has happened in that long, crazy period of time. Moneyman, the decline of the E! Channel, and Dylan are discussed also. We are Pearceless and gu...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 7: I'll Show You Mine if You Show Me Yours! Updated: 2007-09-24 23:04:41 Description: Jokes! Pearce! Cocks! Brian Metcalf appears for possibly the best internet cameo ever. It all comes out in this episode, which must be heard to be believed....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 8: Fair Enough Updated: 2007-10-07 04:47:24 Description: In a show that may or may not have actually happened, the boys improvise their way through sex offenders, the big day out lineup and why you should/shouldn't join the forum....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 3: Seagull vs. Dog Updated: 2007-07-31 10:28:52 Description: In their longest (and best) show yet, the boys are joined by Hannah Lee and Matthew Hoyles to discuss Beauty and the Beast. They also find the time to muse about the Comedy Dogs, yet again + the Lastimes (two long dead Macleans institutions), think ...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 4: I Thought We Had A Deal! Updated: 2007-08-03 23:00:20 Description: In this episode, the boys are alone by themselves, without any guests or even Producer Pearce. This did not deter them however and they found a whole host of things to talk about, turning in their second longest show ever. They talk about fat people,...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 2: Where in the World was the Funny? Updated: 2007-07-22 04:45:33 Description: Hello and Welcome to the Internet, Teacups! The lovely folk trio come and join the guys today and play three songs for your listening pleasure. A long discussion on all things Harry Potter takes place and they also find the time to make fun of nearly...more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Episode 1: Reverend Dobbyn Updated: 2007-07-16 10:13:40 Description: In their second episode, the guys are joined in the studio by Oliver Carle and discuss Dave Dobbyn, the Comedy Dogs (again) and the simpsons among much else. They are quite kind to their producer this time around. Pity....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD Pilot Episode Updated: 2007-07-11 11:22:21 Description: In their first ever episode, the guys discuss work stories, their greatest sandwiches and violently abuse their producer, among much else....more... LISTEN NOW | VIEW CACHE | DOWNLOAD |
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